Feeding 7 People for Less Than the Government Spends on a Single Wrench

Welcome to The Pentagon Pizza Report, where the only thing bigger than the savings is the slice size. While the actual Pentagon is out here casually misplacing billions like it’s loose change in the couch cushions, I'm is busy crafting a pizza party that feeds the whole fam for less than the government spends on a single military-grade screwdriver.

That’s right—no billion-dollar budgets, no classified cheese, no top-secret sauce. Just thrifty, tasty, no-nonsense pizza that won’t require a congressional investigation into your grocery bill.

Because when you’re feeding seven hungry mouths, you don’t need a defense contract—you need Pentagon Pizza.